


Rich Goranski's Totally Awesome Plan To Get Jake The D

by ren_sauce



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Bad Pickup Lines, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Jeremy Heere Has Self-Esteem Issues, M/M, Mutual Pining, Weird flirting, all that good shit, jake is trying his best guys, jake suffering, jeremy being insecure, michael being a shit, rich being a wingman, the amazing wisdom of rich goranski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-07-01 05:45:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15767814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ren_sauce/pseuds/ren_sauce
Summary: (shut up Jake that's an amazing plan name)---"I like Jeremy.""Congratulations, you're officially the last to know."





	1. step 1. try to help your dumb friend

**Author's Note:**

> deere is growing on me a lot so Heere we go

Jake hadn’t really noticed Jeremy that much before.

Like, he knew who the guy was. For a good portion of freshman year he’d just dubbed him as ‘cute algebra guy, second row’. He was the nerdy, hard to notice boy who flinched at loud noises and chewed his pencil down to the lead and almost never rose his hand in class, but always looked so proud of himself when the teacher called on him and he got the question right. Yeah, he was cute. But he wasn’t really a guy Jake had ever seen himself becoming friends with, let alone pursuing.

But then junior year came, and Jeremy was actually kind of cool. He went through the same sort of transformation Rich did after freshman year – he stood up straight, spoke with confidence, made eye contact… He _did_ wear a lot of Eminem shirts, which Jake didn’t really have a problem with usually, but… Jeremy wore those shirts _religiously_. He was still cool though. A chill guy to hang around with. And still very cute. But still, not a guy Jake really saw himself dating.

Then Halloween happened, Rich set a fire, and the school play turned into a massive drug sesh.

Jake didn’t really know all the details, but from the information he got out of Rich and Michael, Rich had gotten some kind of fancy ass Japanese drug some time before sophomore year that made him cool. He gave the same drug to Jeremy, who also became cool. But then their high must’ve crashed or something, because Rich’s drug got him to light himself on fire, and Jeremy’s drug tried to make him take over the world. This lead to everyone in the play taking the same weird ecstasy they did and turning into a big robot drug lord army, which Michael, Jeremy and Christine somehow vanquished with the power of love, friendship, and nineties soft drinks. This also somehow lead to Jeremy, Michael, Christine, Chloe, Brooke, Jenna, Rich and Jake to all become a squad.

After the SQUIPcident, as they now called it, happened, Jake started spending a lot more time around Jeremy. The real Jeremy, not the weird robot minion Jeremy. And, when Jeremy stopped listening to all the weird voices in his head… He was actually a really cool guy.

Jake shouldn’t’ve been all that surprised, really. Jeremy, while hard to notice, had always seemed like a pretty sweet guy. He and Michael had been friends, like, since _birth_ , and their friendship was honestly pretty cute. Jake had always kind of wondered what it’d be like to have a friend you could actually confide in. He supposed Rich was sort of like that for him now, but when he had that weird robot pill, Jake had kind of not really had anyone to go to. He could barely even give pill-Rich a handshake with him saying ‘no homo’. Now Rich says ‘semi homo’, to show off his newly discovered bisexuality. He’s a lot cooler now.

Jeremy really was a nice guy to hang out with. He tended to shield himself with his anxiety, but when he actually let loose, it was clear to see he was passionate about the things he liked. He’d ranted about drama and musicals and how there were many things to consider when it came to bootlegging a show (there really were a lot of things. Like, way more than Jake expected). And he could talk about video games for years. He’d spent a whole lunch hour ranking all the different Legend of Zelda games.

Not that Jake cared. He could probably listen to Jeremy talk forever. When Jeremy talked about stuff he was really passionate about, he started talking quicker and stumbling over his words in excitement and then having to back track and start over. His blue-green eyes would light up, and his hands would gesture wildly. One time, he ended up slapping Jake lightly in the face (he panicked and apologised about seventeen times, despite Jake insisting it was fine). Plus he had the cutest little laugh – sort of breathy but bubbly at the same time – and when he was really bursting with laughter, he’d do this cute little snort-thing and get really embarrassed and clap his hands over his mouth, as if to try and cram the sound back in, it was so _cute,_ and-

Wait.

Shit.

Fuck.

oOo

“I like Jeremy.” Jake announced, bursting into his and Rich’s shared kitchen.

“Congratulations, you’re officially the last to know.” Rich said offhandedly, not even looking up from the pot of noodles he was boiling.

“You _knew?!”_ Jake frowned. “How did you know?! I only know now!”

“Dude.” Rich gave him an unimpressed stare. “You are _so_ obvious. You stare at him like he hung the fucking stars, or whatever that Shakespeare crap is.”

“You’re a true romantic, Rich.”

“Shut it!” Rich snapped, pointing a wooden spoon at him. “I’ve had to deal with your pining bullshit for weeks now, I will complain if I want to!”

“Weeks?!”

“Yes, Jake, weeks!” Rich huffed, rolling his eyes. “It’s sickening, really! You look at him like he’s the fuckin’ moon or some shit!”

“I think it’s sun, Rich.”

“Well then that’s a fucking bullshit saying, Jake. Who the fuck looks at the sun without squinting all weird like a freak?” Rich said angrily, waving his arms in frustration. “Dumb saying! It’s moon now. You look at him like he’s the moon, and he looks at you like you’re fucking – Jupiter or some shit.”

“Uh. Jupiter?”

“Yes, Jake, Jupiter!” Rich snapped. “You’re a big ass planet surrounded by moons and asteroids and shit, and Jeremy’s some fucking nerd with a telescope looking at you from far away like “damn, that’s one thick planet.”. Wake the fuck up, Jake!”

“Rich, you are the weirdest space nerd I’ve ever met.” Jake smiled fondly.

“Shut it! I’m yelling at you! Wait, no I’m not – shit, I’ve forgotten what my point was here.” Rich sighed, flopping into the chair opposite Jake with a plate full of noodles. “Point is – you like Jeremy, Jeremy likes you. Ask him out.”

“Wh- Rich, no!” Jake gasped, almost offended. “I can’t do that?”

“Why not?” Rich frowned, slurping on his noodles. “You ask people out all the time. You’ve hooked up with, like, half the football team. And half the cheerleaders.”

“I know, Rich, I was there.” Jake huffed, pouting. “It’s just – those were just hook-ups or whatever. Jeremy – I don’t wanna just sleep with him…”

“And you made fun of my romantic shit.”

“But I don’t!” Jake cried. “I wanna, like – I wanna go on dates, and hold his stupid hand, and look into his stupid pretty eyes and kiss his stupid cute face and be his stupid boyfriend, dammit!”

“Wow.” Rich whistled. “You’re, like… Actually gone for him, aren’t you?”

 _“Ye-es!”_ Jake whined, slumping his face on the table. “I’ve thought about this a lot, Rich. Like, I thought it was just a physical thing but – it’s not like that! It’s different.” He sighed, pouting against the wood surface. “Richie, what’s wrong with me?”

“Oh, Jakey D.” Rich sighed, patting his cheek fondly. “You’re suffering from acute disaster-pansexual-itis. Stage five, uncurable. Suffer.”

“I _am_ suffering!” Jake whimpered. “What am I supposed to do? I can’t just ask him out! I need to do this right!”

“Jake, you know I’m all for romantic gestures.” Rich smiled. “But you’re _way_ overthinking this. You both like each other, you’re both gay as hell, and you’re both complete messes. Look at how much you have in common! Just ask him out to dinner, or lunch, or something. Something with food! Everyone likes food.”

“Breakfast?”

“Jake, breakfast is the least sexy meal of the day and I’m honestly offended you’d suggest it.” Rich said seriously. “Yknow what? Brunch. Ask him to brunch. Brunch is _hot_. Brunch is where it’s at.”

“So that’s the plan?” Jake frowned, cocking his head. “I ask him to brunch?”

“Whoa, whoa, slow down, speed racer!” Rich laughed. “I never said just ask him out.”

“But?!” Jake gaped at him with frustration. “That’s… exactly what you said?!”

“Well – it’s not what I _meant!”_ Rich said, rolling his eyes. “Sure, maybe with some of the people you’ve hooked up with, just asking them out would work. But not Jeremy. He is but a delicate flower-“

“Rich, I will give you everything I own if you please stop talking like that.”

“Fair enough.” Rich shrugged. “Look, Jeremy’s an anxious guy. That’s like, Jeremy 101. So you gotta be careful and not overwhelm him.”

“I… guess that’s fair.” Jake mumbled, furrowing his brow. “So how do I not freak him out?”

Rich shoved his plate to the side, cracking his knuckles.

“Jakey my boy, prepare to study the awesome wisdom of Rich Goranski.”

oOo

_“First, you’ve gotta test the waters. See if he’s interested.”_

_“But – you said he was interested?”_

_“Can you just let me do my thing please?”_

Jake sighed as he made his way through the crowded hallway, Rich’s advice fresh in his mind. Okay. So he liked Jeremy. And Jeremy… Possibly liked him back? That shouldn’t excite him as much as it did. He’d liked plenty of people before – well. He’d been _attracted_ to plenty of people before. He’d liked some people, like Christine, but it had always faded after a few days. Jake had actually seriously began to believe something was wrong with him. It actually kind of upset him when the Jeremy thing started, because Jeremy was a genuinely nice guy. The thought of just moving on from Jeremy to something new just felt wrong. Well, hardy fucking ha, because it never moved on, did it? No, now it was a million times worse.

No, dammit, calm down, Jake! He shook himself, trying to shake some sense back into him. It was good he liked Jeremy like this. Jeremy was a stand-up guy, and there was a chance he liked Jake back. Besides, Jake was a pro when it came to flirting. He had this in the bag.

“Hey, Jerry!” He greeted loudly as he reached Jeremy’s locker. Jeremy squeaked and jumped, turning around quickly.

“Oh, uh – h-hey, Jake!” He smiled nervously. Jake winced. He hadn’t meant to actually to scare Jeremy. This was already off to a bad start…

“Hey.” Jake smiled. “Wait. Did I say that already?”

“Uh – kinda.” Jeremy laughed gently. “But don’t worry. I’ve done plenty more embarrassing things. Not that you’re embarrassing! I just – um…”

“Jer, chill. It was kinda embarrassing.” Jake chuckled, slinging an arm over Jeremy’s shoulders and immediately regretting it when Jeremy tensed against him. However, he quickly relaxed into Jake’s touch, much to Jake’s relief. Maybe this was going okay after all…

“It wasn’t that bad.” Jeremy said. Jake felt a small smile spread across his face. Jeremy was so sweet. “Really – I-I’ve done a lot worse. There was, um, there was this one time, when I was like seven, and my shoe laces came undone in assembly and I didn’t know how to tie them back, so I accidentally tied them together and had to hop out of the room and try not to cry.” He laughed awkwardly, and froze suddenly. “I… Don’t know why I told you that. I’m sorry.”

“It’s cool.” Jake said gently. He remembered Rich’s advice. “I, uh…” He mumbled, smiling and looking away. “I like listening to you.”

He heard an awkward squeak from beside him. He glanced back at Jeremy, who was staring at the ground intensely, pink dusting his pale cheeks.

Holy shit.

Holy _shit_.

Jake bit back a grin.

“So,” He smiled reassuringly, grabbing Jeremy’s books from his locker. “Homeroom?”

“R-Right!” Jeremy yelped, ducking under Jake’s arm. “Homeroom!”

“Jer, hey – your books?” Jake called as Jeremy sprinted away. He laughed quietly and rolled his eyes. Maybe this could work.

 _Maybe_.

oOo

 _“Okay, so what happens if he_ is _interested?”_

_“Then you start laying some groundwork.”_

_“Groundwork?”_

_“I mean flirting, Jake. Let him know you’re interested.”_

_“But if he’s already interested why can’t I just_ tell _him that I’m-“_

_“Just let me do my fucking thing, Jake!”_

Jake bounced his leg nervously under the table. Okay. Flirting. He could flirt. Flirting was easy. Just go up to him and say… Something. Fuck, how did words work? He normally just winged it, but he had a feeling the words wouldn’t come as easily with Jeremy. Not like it was hard to think of compliments for Jeremy – Jeremy was… Perfect, really, but that was the problem! He just made Jake forget what he was about to say!

“Can you stop wobbling the table, please?” Chloe sighed as she spread polish smoothly on Jenna’s nails. “If you make me mess this up, I’ll stab you with my spork.”

“Sorry.” Jake mumbled, forcing his leg to be still.

About five seconds later, his leg started jiggling again.

“Jake!” Chloe snapped. “I swear to god, I’ll make you drink my nail polish remover!”

“Sorry!” Jake yelped.

“Seriously, what’s up with you?” Chloe huffed, flicking some left over polish onto his arm. “You’ve been acting weird all day.”

“Uh – i-it’s nothing, I just, um…”

Oh crap there he was.

“Be right back!” Jake said quickly, catapulting himself out of his chair and all but sprinting across the cafeteria to where Jeremy and Michael were talking.

“- like it’s a good game, but it was a pretty shitty idea to have the white girl robot lecture the black guy robot on what it meant to be a slave!”

“Yeah!” Jeremy nodded, his eyes shining with that glow that only appeared when he was talking about something he really cared about. “I think it could’ve been a great concept if they hadn’t executed it so – oh, uh, hey Jake!”

“And that’s my cue to go.” Michael snickered, slurping his slushie loudly as he walked to their table and sat down next to Rich happily. Jake could’ve sworn he’d seen him glare at him…

“What’d he say?”

“Uh – nothing!” Jeremy said quickly. “He’s just… Being Michael. What’s up?”

“Um!” Fuck fuck shit fuck. “I just. Y’know. Wanted to chat.”

“Oh, uh. Okay?” Jeremy smiled gently, a little confused. “Chat away.”

Shit.

“A-Are you from Tennessee?!” Jake blurted randomly. Oh shit. Really? That was the best line he could come up with?

Jeremy cocked his head, and Jake tried not to burst into flame.

“I was… born here?” Jeremy frowned. “We went to the same kindergarten, did – did you not know that?”

“Uh.” Fuck. Pull it together, Dillinger! “Because – y-you’re the only ten I see!”

Jeremy’s frown deepened.

“I’m sixteen?” He said slowly. “I mean I’ll be seventeen soon, but I’m not – do I look ten?”

“I – no, that’s not what I…” Jake sighed, hanging his head. “Never mind. Let’s just eat lunch.”

Okay. Maybe this would be a little harder than he thought.

oOo

“So?” Rich grinned wolfishly as they entered their apartment. “Is it time to engage step three?”

“No!” Jake groaned, walking to their couch and falling onto it face first. “Your steps are bullshit!”

“Dude, you’re talking into the couch cushions. I didn’t hear a word you just said.”

“I _said!”_ Jake huffed, turning his face so his mouth wasn’t smushed into the cushions. “Your steps are bullshit! Jeremy – he’s, like, _actually_ clueless! It’s not going to work, Rich!”

“Oh dear.” Rich sighed, jumping onto his armchair. “Okay, open up. Tell Doctor Goranski how you’re feeling.”

“Ugh.” Jake groaned miserably. “Do I have to?”

“Yes. This is court mandated therapy. Non-negotiable.”

“Why does the court care about my failing love life?”

“Because, Jake, you’re honestly kind of bumming the court out with your sad pining. So!” Rich exclaimed, leaning forward and stroking a fake beard. “Please, use this as the perfect time to bitch about your dumb feelings.”

“Really feeling the love here, Richie.”

“Silence!” Rich yelled. “Now! Bitch to me!”

“Well.” Jake sighed. “I tried flirting with him today and… He just didn’t get it. Like, I used a pretty dumb line but… It was pretty clear.”

“That’s it?” Rich frowned. “That’s nothing!”

“But – I don’t…”  Jake turned and whined into a throw pillow. “It’s just hopeless, Rich! I can’t… I can’t go for a guy like Jeremy. He’s just… Too good. And I’m _me_.”

“And what does that mean?”

Jake bit his lip.

“What if I just drop him?” He sighed. “Like – what if there’s _actually_ something wrong with me? I – I _really like him,_ Richie. So what if, what if something does happen, okay, then what? I’ll get bored and move on like I always do and I can’t – I _can’t_ do that to him, Rich.”

“Y’know what I think?”

“Something gross, probably.”

“I think that you not wanting to date Jeremy because you’re scared of hurting him just shows how much you care about him.” Rich smiled, looking almost proud. “Seriously dude. Leave the overthinking to your boyfriend. You obviously want this to work. And if you want it to work, then you’ll make it work. Won’t you?”

Jake frowned. “That… actually kind of makes sense.” His lips quirked into a small smile. “Thanks, Doctor Goranski.”

“You’re welcome, my dude!” Rich grinned. “Now go fuck your mom!”

“What?!”

“Sorry.” He shrugged. “Obligatory Sigmund Freud joke. That guy was on a whole new level of crack.”

oOo

_“He really is clueless though. How am I supposed to let him know I’m interested?”_

_“Just keep going. Like, as obviously as you can. He’ll have to get it after a while, right?”_

Wrong.

Incredibly wrong.

“So, uh.” Jake hummed offhandedly one lunchtime. Jeremy had borrowed a video game or something from Michael, and had forgotten to give it back at homeroom, so naturally Jake had gone with him to his locker to go get it. “A-Are you religious?”

“Yep.” Jeremy smiled proudly as he dug around his locker. “I’m Jewish.”

“Because you’re – wait, really?”

“Well – sort of.” Jeremy shrugged nervously. “Like, I celebrate Hanukkah and stuff, but that’s about it. And I had a bar mitzvah.”

Okay, fuck pickup lines, this was actually pretty interesting.

“Y’know, I actually don’t know what happens at a bar mitzvah?” Jake frowned. “Like, Rich used to say they cut your dick off, but that was when he was all SQUIP-y.”

Jeremy laughed, a small snort bubbling in his throat.

“Oh!” He gasped, clapping a hand over his mouth. “Sorry, that was, um, that was kinda gross.”

“It’s really fine, Jer.” Jake smiled. “So, uh – I-I always kinda wondered – I mean you don’t have to answer-“

“You know you can just ask what happens at a bar mitzvah, right?” Jeremy smirked, amused. “Like, it’s not gonna offend me that you want to know.”

“Oh!” Jake laughed awkwardly. “That’s, uh… That’s good.”

“You have to ask though, Jake.”

“Right!” Christ, why did Jeremy do this to him? “Okay, what happens at a Bar Mitzvah?”

“Well, at my bar mitzvah, I read from the Torah, and I made a speech and suddenly, I became a man.”

“Huh.” Jake shrugged. “That’s cool. I’m pretty sure I can think of funner ways to become a man, though.”

“It’s ‘more fun’, Jake.”

“Oh – yeah.” Jake chuckled, looking away. “Yeah, sorry.”

“No, it’s okay!” Jeremy smiled reassuringly. “I wasn’t trying to be mean or anything, I wasn’t – sorry.”

“It’s fine, Jeremy.” Jake said firmly, still not looking at him. “Really.”

Jeremy gnawed his lip next to him, busying himself with his locker so he didn’t have to look at Jake, and they fell into an awkward silence. Jake kicked himself. This was stupid, he hadn’t meant to do this.

“I had a party!” Jeremy exclaimed suddenly. “Uh – at my bar mitzvah. I had a formal party with my family, and a few of my aunts gave me some money, which was nice. And then I had an actual party with Michael.”

“Yeah?” Jake smiled, grateful that Jeremy had brought them out of their uncomfortable silence. “That sounds nice.”

“It was kinda lame…” Jeremy chuckled bitterly, looking away. “It was just me and Michael in my basement, playing video games and eating pizza. I-It was fun, but… Probably not like your parties.”

“That actually sounds really nice.” Jake smiled fondly. “I wouldn’t mind just chilling and playing video games with a buddy.”

“Really?” Jeremy asked, perking up visibly.

“Really.” Jake grinned. Dimly, in the back of his mind, he remembered Rich’s advice. “Uh – hey! I do have an Xbox. I don’t have that, uh, zombie game you and Michael play, but I do have Call of Duty?”

He noticed Jeremy’s lip twitch to the side slightly.

“Or Sonic, if that’s more your speed?” Jake chuckled slightly. “Heh. Speed.”

“I like Sonic.” Jeremy smiled. “Wait, so – I’m going to your place?”

“Yeah!” He grinned. “Totally! We can hang out, just bros…”

Jake noticed Jeremy’s nervous eyes, hopeful voice, and the soft tint of pink spreading over his cheeks.

_“And then, once you’re sure he’s gotten the message, just go for it!”_

“… Or, like… A date?”

Jeremy froze where he was standing, hands still digging around his locker.

“A…” He said quietly, wide eyes finally finding their way to Jake's. “A date?”

“Yeah.” Jake mumbled, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. “Like – obviously we wouldn’t be playing Sonic on the date, like, that’s the dumbest date idea I’ve ever heard, but, uh… We could go to the mall? Grab pizza? Or something else, I’m cool with whatever you wanna-“

“I need to give this back to Michael.” Jeremy cut him off, his eyes now hard and cold. He pulled the video game out of his locker, walking past Jake roboticly.

“Whoa, hey?” Jake frowned, grabbing his arm gently. “Is that a yes, or-?”

“Y’know, Jake?!” Jeremy snapped suddenly, ripping his arm away from him. “I – I-I’d’ve expected this from, like – I-I dunno, Rich, o-or something, when he was SQUIPed, but-!” He deflated slightly, and Jake swore he saw his eyes water. “Not you.”

Jake felt himself break. “Jeremy-“

“Not _you_.” Jeremy whispered, voice breaking, before turning and running away, leaving Jake alone in the corridor.

Jake sighed, and closed Jeremy’s locker door for him. He barely concentrated for the rest of the day. Mr Reyes actually asked him if he was feeling okay.

When Jake got home, he went to his laptop, closed the one tab he had open (“50 Hilarious Cheesy Pick-Up Lines That Will Definitely Make Your Crush Smile!”), and went to bed.


	2. step 2. force these idiots to talk about their dumb feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, trying to write this fucking make out scene: how am i, a massive fucking ace, expected to handle this?

Jeremy had definitely noticed Jake before.

Like, who hadn’t? Jake was _Jake_. Highschool awesomeness personified. Everyone had noticed Jake Dillinger, especially Jeremy.

It wasn’t a creepy thing. Not really. So _maybe_ he’d ogled Jake’s arms a little too much during freshman year, and _maybe_ that had made him realise, oh shit, maybe he wasn’t as straight as he thought, and _maybe_ that had led to him and Michael platonically kissing for science when they were both high that one time, and _maybe_ that series of events had been what led Jeremy to tentatively label himself as bisexual. Honestly, he was sure a lot of people had had a sexuality crisis after laying eyes on Jake Dillinger.

He had never really thought of Jake as someone he’d seen himself dating. He’d seen him as untouchable, sure, a highschool jock god looking down on all the mere mortals below him. He’d seen him as competition, when it came to the whole Christine thing (and it honestly wasn’t helped by Jake being so damn nice about the whole thing). He’d also seen him as a possible murderer, back during Halloween where Jake had chased him throughout the house because Chloe had tried to have sex with him in Jake’s parents room (Jake had been considerably less nice then). But never really someone Jeremy had considered dating.

But then Jeremy’s SQUIP tried to take over the world by using Jeremy as a stepping stone, and things started to change.

Jeremy had honestly thought of Jake as some rich, untouchable trust fund baby. But after all the shit that went down, and the popular kids, through either the power of the good lord himself or just incredibly poor judgement, decided to become friends with Jeremy and Michael, Jake had become a lot more constant in their lives. And Jeremy was actually quite enjoying learning new things about him.

For example, after the whole Halloween incident, Jake had stayed with his aunt for a bit before deciding to get his own apartment. The moment Rich came out of the hospital, he asked him to be his roommate. Rich had been pretty shocked, and had actually refused at first, which, honestly, was pretty understandable. Like, Jeremy knew Rich’s SQUIP had been mostly to blame for the whole fire incident, but still. Jeremy knew how it felt to make a massive mistake. And he knew how it felt to feel like he didn’t deserve forgiveness for that mistake. Luckily, Jake (and Michael, in Jeremy’s case) were very forgiving people.

Also, Jake very much enjoyed cooking. Apparently, with his parents being gone, Jake had to learn how to cook for himself (Jeremy could sort of relate. His dad had never abandoned him, but he had been out of commission for a _while_ ), and actually began to really like it, especially deserts. According to Rich, his chocolate and orange zest crepes were to die for.

And speaking of sweet things, Jake was probably the sweetest person Jeremy had ever met.

Now, Christine, Brooke and Michael were very sweet people. They adored their friends, they went the extra mile to show their love and support to their loved ones, and Jeremy cherished them with all his heart. But Jake? Jake was ‘help an old lady cross the street and then give her the shirt on his back because she looked cold’ sweet. ‘Stay behind after frisbee golf practice for a whole evening just to help a freshman fix his throw and then take him to Pinkberry as a reward’ sweet. ‘Go to the same alley every single day to feed the box full of puppies that lived there and never stopping until he’d made sure each and every one of them had been adopted into a kind and loving home’ sweet. Jake didn’t just go the extra mile – he took the normal distance, multiplied it by ten, and didn’t even break a sweat, because that’s just what he thought was normal.

Eventually, Jeremy couldn’t help but fall for him.

Well, could you blame him?! Jeremy was a weak disaster bisexual and Jake was a literal god among men. Anyone who was attracted to guys had liked Jake at some point.

Ugh. Saying it like that made it sound past tense. Like he _had_ liked Jake but had gotten over it by now. Anyone would be able to tell you that that was definitely not the case.

And by anyone, Jeremy meant Michael.

“Hey Jeremy?” Michael asked as Jeremy paced around his basement, drawing out the ‘y’ sound. “Whatcha doin’?”

“It just doesn’t make any sense, why is he being so nice? Like I know that Jake’s a nice person but he actually gave me his jacket the other day, is that just a regularly nice thing to do for him, or is he trying to say something?”

“Jeremy?” Michael said again. “Whatcha doin’, bud?”

“Because giving someone a jacket, a varsity jacket, that’s like something from a teen romcom – but then again, maybe I’m just looking into things, like, Jake’s just a really friendly person, but _also_ then again, he does have a lot of friends and I’ve never seen him give a jacket to any of them, unless he was dating them – oh god…”

“’Cause it looks like you’re being a little bitch to me.”

“Michael!” Jeremy snapped. “I am in the middle of a _crisis_ here!”

 “I know, you’ve ranted to me about for two days straight!” Michael retorted. “Or should I say two days bi?”

“That’s not funny!” Jeremy spluttered, collapsing into a bean bag. “What do I _do?!”_

“Dude.” Michael sighed, smiling gently and running his hands through Jeremy’s hair. “He _obviously_ likes you. Just go for it!”

“I _can’t_ go for it, Micah.” Jeremy mumbled, leaning into his friends comforting touch. “What if I’m wrong? He’ll be so weirded out and then we won’t even be friends anymore and then he’ll tell everyone and they’ll go too-“

“Dude! Chill out, it’s okay.” Michael chuckled, rubbing little circles into his scalp. “Look, this is Jake we’re talking about. He’s not the type to just swallow down his feelings. If he does like you, he’ll definitely ask you out soon.”

“No, he won’t.” Jeremy huffed. “Because he doesn’t like me. He’s just being nice.”

“You spent, like, two hours wondering if he was just being nice or if he actually did like you. How did you come to a conclusion that quickly?”

“Because!” Jeremy whined, throwing his arms up in frustration. “He’s _him_ , and I’m _me!”_

Michael rose an eyebrow. “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

Jeremy sighed, his hands dropping to his sides.”

“Nothing.” He said, defeated. “It means nothing. Lets just get past this level, okay?”

“You can’t keep hiding your feelings just ‘cause you’re scared of getting hurt, Jer.”

“Yeah?” Jeremy mumbled, shooting a zombie in the face. “Watch me.”

oOo

It was honestly a miracle Jeremy had managed to dial Michael’s number. With his fingers shaking so much and him dripping tears on the screen, it was honestly impressive.

 _“Hey, man!”_ Jeremy could hear the smile in Michael’s voice, tinny and shrill through the phone. _“What’s up, why’re ya callin’ me? Did you seriously get lost trying to find your own locker ‘cause that is some next level shit right there, Jer-“_

“Michael?” Jeremy sniffled, voice breaking painfully. Michael paused.

 _“What happened?”_ He said seriously, in his ‘I am going to murder someone today’ voice.

“Nothing, nothing’s wrong.” Jeremy lied easily, attempting to wipe his eyes with his shoulder. “I got your game.”

 _“Jeremy, I honestly don’t care about that right now.”_ Michael said firmly. _“Where are you?”_

“Bathrooms.” Jeremy said softly. “Next to the band rooms. I’m sorry, you don’t have to come, I’m just being stupid-”

_“You’re not stupid, Jer. You’re upset. That’s not stupid. I’m on my way now.”_

“Sorry.” Jeremy whispered again before smashing the hang-up button with his thumb.

He buried his head between his knees, his breath coming out in short pants. Tears fell from his eyes, streaked down his gross red face and splashed onto the floor. Jeremy was an ugly crier.

He felt so humiliated. He really thought that Jake was nice, that they were friends – and it was all nothing. Just a set up for a disgusting prank that Jeremy fell for, hook, line and sinker. God, he was pathetic. No wonder Jake had done that. Jeremy was a walking target, he was practically asking to get screwed over. Why would Jake have even wanted to be around him? Why would any of his new friends want to? Maybe they were all in on it, too. Maybe they were all laughing about him right now, about how stupid he was, how pathetic, _everything about him is so terrible-_

“Jeremy?!”

Michael’s voice snapped him out of his spiral.

“Jeremy, are you in here?”

Jeremy sniffled, swiped his sleeve over his face in an attempt to dry up all the gross evidence of his crying, and reluctantly stepped out of the stall.

“Hey, M-Micah.” He tried to smile, but it looked more like a grimace. “W-What’s up?”

Suddenly, Michael was hugging him, and Jeremy was crying all over again.

“It’s okay.” He murmured into Jeremy’s hair. “It’s okay, I’m here, it’s all okay. C’mon, come with me, let’s get you home.”

“B-But!” Jeremy blubbered, tears soaking through Michael’s hoodie. “What about s-school?”

“Fuck school, Jer.” Michael declared, hugging him tightly. “Right now, I wanna make sure you’re okay. C’mon, we’ll go to my place, my moms aren’t home.”

“Video games?” Jeremy sniffled. Michael sighed, rubbing his back reassuringly.

“Fine. But then you tell me what happened. Okay?”

Jeremy’s far too tired to protest.

oOo

“So let me get this gay.” Michael said, setting down his can of crystal pepsi. “You have been pining over Jake for about a month now.”

“I-It wasn’t a _month_ …” Jeremy protested half-heartedly. “But yeah…”

“And he’s been hitting on you since forever.”

“Not forever!” Jeremy squeaked. “A-And I never said he was hitting on me, i-it just _felt_ like he was, but he obviously wasn’t!”

“Dude.” Michael gave him an unimpressed stare. “He asked if you were from Tennessee. That is the most obvious pick up line I’ve ever heard.”

“Wh- no, that is not-!”

“Moving on!” Michael yelled over him. “So you like him, it’s safe to say he likes you too, he asked you out, you yelled at him, ran away, and had a panic attack in a bathroom. Am I missing anything?”

“It wasn’t like that!” Jeremy cried helplessly. “He – he _doesn’t_ like me. It was all just some – s-stupid _prank!”_

“How?”

Jeremy stilled, frowning at him.

“How?” He echoed.

“How was it a prank?” Michael said, unimpressed. “Because from what I know, all that happened was he asked you out. How do you know it was a prank?”

“Because!” Jeremy snapped. “Because – because it’s _Jake_ , Michael! Do you seriously think he’d go for someone like me?”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Michael said darkly, eyes narrowed.

“It – it means that he’s highschool awesomeness personified, and I’m just some anxious geek with sweaty hands and, and-!”

“Dude!” Michael grabbed Jeremy’s hands to keep them from pulling on his hair. Huh, he hadn’t even realised that was happening. “Jeremy, you gotta calm down, dude. Jake may be an ass sometimes, but never intentionally. D’you really think he’d do something like that?”

“Well, obviously he did!” Jeremy cried. “He – he just looked so… _Scared,_ when he was asking.”

“Aww!”

“Do not aww!” Jeremy snapped, pointing at him accusingly. “It’s not cute, it’s suspicious! Jake Dillinger does not get scared. He’s asked out almost everyone in the school without breaking a sweat! He doesn’t get scared when he asks someone out. That means he didn’t mean it! He was just scared of getting caught.”

“Or maybe he really likes you and was scared of being rejected?” Michael offered. “Do you have any solid proof that he was just pranking you?”

“He – he wouldn’t – Michael!” Jeremy groaned. “It doesn’t matter, alright?! He’d never want to date me and that’s final.”

“Dude.” Michael said gently, throwing his arm over Jeremy’s shoulders. “Give yourself a little credit here. You’re cute, you’re funny, sure, you had a little bit of a world domination phase but what teenager hasn’t gone through that at some point?”

“Michael!”

“Jeremy! Look, you seriously need to get over this whole – _thing_ you have.”

“Thing?” Jeremy frowned.

“Yes, your thing!” Michael growled in frustration. “You have this whole – _complex_ that no matter how hard you try, you’re just never good enough! Isn’t that exhausting sometimes?”

“But I’m _not_ good enough!” Jeremy retorted, cringing at how whiny and bratty he sounded. God, no wonder Jake hated him…

“Jeremy, stop it!” Michael snapped. “You need to stop comparing yourself to other people. You have this – this _belief_ that everyone’s better than you when you’re measuring it all wrong! Look how far you’ve come, Jer. You’re more confident, you talk louder and more clearly, your relationship with your dad is healing, and it’s pretty clear you’ve been a lot happier lately. You just don’t notice because you only notice the bad stuff that happens when you _should_ be focussing on the good, and I know it’s hard to do that!” He added, before Jeremy could argue. “Believe me, I know. But you need to _try_ to stay in the moment. You need to give yourself credit when it’s due. You’ve come _so far_ , Jeremy, and I’m so proud of you. I just… I wish you could see it, too.”

Jeremy choked back a sob.

“Great.” He muttered. “Now I’m crying for a whole ‘nother reason. Dammit, Mike…”

“Jeremy.” Michael smiled softly, pulling him into a hug. “Cut yourself some slack, dude. I’d say I’m almost as messed up as you are, besides the whole super computer taking over your brain and emotionally manipulating and abusing you thing. Would you be this hard on me?”

“… No.” Jeremy sighed.

“Rich had a SQUIP, too. He goes through some of the same stuff you do. Would you be this hard on him, too?”

 _“No_ , Michael.” Jeremy huffed, pouting into Michael’s hoodie. “I get it, alright? Can we just drop it now?”

“Nope, not done yet, sorry!” Michael grinned. “Look, Jer – this whole thing that you have, that you’re not good enough, that you’re not – _worthy_ of people loving you… You have it all wrong.”

“Michael-“

“Christine, Brooke – hell, I used to have a _massive_ crush on you.” Michael chuckled, giving him a quick squeeze. “You’re not unlovable, Jer. I wish you could see that.”

“Why do you have to be such a good friend?” Jeremy sighed. “Can we just… Play Apocalypse Of The Damned and pretend that everything’s fine for a bit?”

 _“Fine_.” Michael groaned as he handed Jeremy his controller. “But you have to face your feelings at some point, Jer.”

“I will.” Jeremy huffed, staring flatly at the level 10 loading screen. “Just… Not now. Please?”

Michael rolled his eyes.

“Fine. But if you don’t sort all this shit out, I’m doing it for you.”

“Sure, Mike.” Jeremy scoffed. “By the way, your character’s dying.”

“What?!” Michael cried as his character got killed by a zombie. “You – hey! I didn’t know we’d started yet, do over!”

“No do overs!”

“C’mon, this is a two player game! That’s against the rules!”

_“There are no rules in hell!!”_

oOo

“Richie.” Michael sighed. “I can’t stop thinking about Jeremy.”

Rich looked up from where he was sucking a hickey into Michael’s neck.

“Yeah. Cuz _that’s_ what I wanna hear right now.”

“Wh- no, I mean Jake and Jeremy! Y’know, together?”

“Oh thanks, _that_ helps!”

“No – not like _that!”_ Michael huffed, shoving Rich off him and onto his bed. “They’re just – they’re so obviously pining for each other and neither of them realise it!”

Rich frowned, curling into Michael’s side. “I thought Jake asked Jeremy out?”

“Jeremy had this big anxiety _thing_ , it became a huge mess.” Michael sighed, wrapping his arm around Rich’s waist and nuzzling his hair. “They’re just so _dumb,_ Richie!”

“Tell me about it!” Rich groaned. “I had to listen to Jake go on and on about Jeremy last night! I could barely hear him cuz he kept talking while he was eating icecream, but from what I _did_ hear, he thinks Jeremy totally rejected him!”

“Jeremy thinks Jake wasn’t even asking him out and was just trying to prank him!

“Does he know Jake?!”

“I mean, judging by the amount of time he spends talking about him, you’d assume he did.” Michael huffed, hugging Rich closer. “It’s his anxiety. He has this whole _thing_ where he doesn’t think he’s good enough for anyone to really love him or whatever.”

“Ugh. I know that feel.” Rich sighed. “Not fun.”

Michael rolled them so Rich was completely wrapped protectively in Michael’s arms, propping his chin on Rich’s forehead.

“I love you.” He murmured, kissing Rich’s hair. “Daily reminder.”

“Love you, too, dumbass.” Rich scoffed. “But what’re we gonna do about the idiots?”

“Well,” Michael sighed reluctantly. “I guess we’re gonna have to take this into our own hands.”

“Shove ‘em in a closet?”

“Shove ‘em in a closet.” Michael confirmed, pulling away just so he could smile at Rich properly. “God, I love you.”

“Shut up!” Rich laughed, shoving his face away gently. “I thought it was supposed to just be a daily reminder?”

“Not enough!” Michael whined. “It’s an hourly reminder, at _least!”_

 _“Fine.”_ Rich groaned with fake exasperation. He smiled, pressing a kiss to Michael’s glasses. “Love you too, dork. Hourly reminder.”

“Aww.” Michael cooed, before realisation struck. “Dude! Now my glasses are all smudgy!”

“Does that mean you have been…”

“Don’t you dare!”

“Blinded by my love?” Rich grinned, waggling his eyebrows.

“Shut up, I was blind before I met you.” Michael huffed, cleaning his glasses with his shirt. “You’re so lucky you’re cute.”

“Yeah.” Rich smirked, nudging Michael’s side gently. “Now c’mon! Make out time! And no thinking about other guys! I wanna be your main focus for tonight.”

“You’re my main focus all the time, stop being greedy!” Michael laughed, rolling them so Rich was straddling his hips again.

“Nope!” Rich grinned, popping the ‘p’. “For now, you’re all mine, Mell.”

“Jesus.” Michael shuddered. “I love you so much.”

Rich smiled mischievously, leaning down to kiss the little soft spot beneath Michael’s jaw.

“Love you, too. Minutely reminder.”

oOo

“Hey, Jeremy!” Michael smiled one day during Trig. That was when Jeremy knew something was up. No one smiled during Trig. “D’you mind helping me out before we leave today? I left something in one of the art rooms and I need to go get it.”

Jeremy narrowed his eyes. “What’d you leave?”

Michael smirked. “Oh, just stuff. That I need. For Rich. Later tonight.”

Damn. The only way to tell if Michael was lying would be to ask for more details, and Jeremy… _really_ didn’t want to know the details.

“Fine.” He sighed, packing up his stuff. “On one condition!”

“Mhm?”

“Never ever tell me anything, not even a single vague detail, about what you and Rich do ever ever _ever_ again. Deal?”

“Deal.” Michael grinned, shaking Jeremy’s hand firmly. “C’mon! Bell’s about to go and we all know Aled isn’t gonna care whether we leave early or not.”

Aled Williams was the head of the mathematics department. When he first started at Middleborough, odds were he was an eager teacher who wanted to encourage kids to learn. But after twenty years of asshole students, he kind of just. Sat there. Waiting for the final bell to ring.

“See ya, Aled!” Michael called as they left. Mr Williams groaned from where he was sitting face down on his desk.

“I think he’s doing better.” Jeremy said hopefully as they climbed the stairs to the art rooms. “He only cried twice today!”

“Maybe he’s just crying at home now.” Michael frowned thoughtfully. “Or maybe his water bottle is actually full of vodka and he’s too dehydrated to cry.”

 “I wouldn’t put it past him…” Jeremy mumbled as they stepped into one of the art rooms. “Look, lets just get your shit and go? I really don’t wanna see anything I don’t have to.”

“Odds are you will.” Michael shrugged. “I do need your help looking, and you are _going_ to look, we made a deal, no take backs!”

“I know!” Jeremy huffed, leaning down to search under the desks. “Look, I do _not_ wanna know what you’re looking for right now, but if you could give me some… _vague_ description so I know what to look for?”

“It’s just a regular white plastic bag. Don’t look in it!”

“Believe me, I do _not_ want to.” Jeremy grumbled. “Ugh, why is there so much gum under here?”

“Our school is a disgusting hellscape filled with crazed monster babies.” Michael sighed, rummaging through some drawers. “Hey, why don’t I look around in here, and you go check in the art closet?”

Jeremy rose an eyebrow. “You seriously think you would’ve left it in there?”

“I don’t _know,_ Jeremy, that’s why I’m asking you to look, _duh!”_ Michael huffed, folding his arms. “Now do what you did up until the end of junior year and get into the closet!”

Okay, well. Jeremy couldn’t really argue with him there.

He sighed dramatically, heading into the closet and grabbing a paint pot to keep to door open. The closet door tended to stick and Jeremy didn’t really want to get locked in all night.

“Okay, there’s like, fifteen different plastic bags here, Mike.” He called. “How am I supposed to know which one’s yours?”

“Well, I guess you’re gonna have to look inside ‘em, Jer!”

“What?!” Jeremy cried. “Why can’t you just look in them?!”

“I guess that’s fair!” Michael called from outside. Why did he sound so pleased? “Okay, lemme just walk on over there and _oopsie!”_

Jeremy flinched as a loud clatter echoed through the closet, the sliver of light disappearing as the door slammed shut.

“Michael?!” He gasped, rushing to the door. “Michael, the door won’t open!”

“Oh, I am _so_ sorry, Jer!” Michael said unapologetically from outside. “I accidentally tripped outside and kicked the paint pot you were using to prop open the door which caused the door to close and stick shut! God, I am such a _dingus.”_

Jeremy opened his mouth to protest, but was cut off by the click of a lock.

“Michael?!” He squeaked, pounding on the door.

“Oh, what a mishap!” Michael gasped dramatically. “I seem to have accidentally bumped the key and made the door lock, what a total mistake!”

“Michael, let me out!” Jeremy cried. “You know I don’t like closed spaces, o-or the dark, and this is a c-closed dark space, th-this is my _hell_ , Michael!”

No response.

“M-Michael?” He called out helplessly. “Michael, are you out there?!”

Still nothing. Jeremy whimpered, trying not to just curl in on himself and die on the spot.

“C’mon, Mike, this isn’t funny!” He yelled, shoving his shoulder against the door to no avail. “J-Just let me out already!”

“Jeremy?” Someone said from outside. “That you in there?”

Oh, god. No, no, no no no no _no!_

“Jake?” Jeremy whispered in horror.

“Um. Are you stuck in there?”

“No!” Jeremy all but shrieked. “I-I just… Enjoy… Being locked in a tiny dark room.”

“Uh. Really?”

“Y-Yeah!” Jeremy nodded frantically, even though he knew Jake couldn’t see him. “This is my jam!”

His _jam?!_ Why was he made this way, why why _why?!_

“… _Okay…”_ Jake drawled awkwardly. “I’m gonna unlock the door anyways. Just in case you wanna leave.”

“That would probably be best.” Jeremy mumbled as the lock clicked again and the door swung open.

“There.” Jake smiled smoothly, that stupid pretty smile with the perfect teeth and the cute dimples, _damn him._ “So, are you gonna be staying in here much longer, or-?”

_“Yeet!”_

Jake squawked as he collapsed into the closet, sending both him and Jeremy to the ground and _oh, fuck,_ this was _not_ a good position to be in right now, okay!

“Mother-!” Jake growled. Jeremy could practically feel the vibrations in his chest. He tried not to scream. “What the fuck?!”

“Sorry!” Rich grinned from behind them, slamming the door shut and locking it behind him.

“Rich!” Jake yelled, pulling himself up and off of Jeremy (thank fuck). “What the shit, man, let us out!”

“Nope, sorry, no can doozles!” Jeremy could practically hear the smile in Rich’s voice. “You two need to get your shit together, and we’re not letting you out until you do!”

“Come on, Rich!” Jake snarled. “This is a dick move, just open the door already!”

“Nope!” Michael yelled back. “Like Rich said, you guys need to get your shit together! All your shit! All together!”

“And when we get back, we expect all your shit to be all together in a neat little pile. Got it?!”

“That’s an image.” Jeremy muttered.

“No one likes a smartass, Jeremy!”

“We’ll be back soon!” Michael called. “Or not. Depends how long making out under the bleachers’ll take. Have fun!”

Jeremy heard footsteps walking away from the closet and sighed. In the back of his mind, he supposed Michael had warned him about this, but in Jeremy’s defence, how was he supposed to know there would be consequences for his actions?

“Here.” Jake mumbled above him. Jeremy’s gaze flicked upwards to see Jake holding his hand out for him.

“Uh…”

“Unless you’re planning on staying on the floor until they get back?”

“It’s a solid plan…” Jeremy muttered under his breath, gingerly taking Jake’s hand and letting him pull him up (sidebar, _god damn_ Jake was strong did he work out he probably did _shut up bisexuality!)_

Jake tugged him to his feet, one hand holding Jeremy’s elbow gently to steady him. He didn’t even need steadying, Jake was just that kind of person. Jeremy cleared his throat awkwardly, backing a few steps away so they weren’t so close, hoping Jake didn’t notice his nervousness. Jake looked away solemnly, and Jeremy bit his lip. He totally noticed…

Jeremy scowled, digging his nails into the palm of his hand. So what if Jake noticed? Maybe Jeremy wanted him to feel guilty, dammit! Jake was the one who asked him out as some stupid prank, he deserved to feel guilty!

He heard Michael’s voice in the back of his mind. _You don’t_ know _that…_

Ugh. Dammit, Michael.

“Guess we’re gonna be stuck here for a while.” Jake mumbled, kicking the floor idly. Jeremy nodded, refusing to look at him.

“Guess so.”

“Think we should call someone to come let us out?”

Jeremy checked his phone quickly and sighed. “I can’t get any signal in here. You?”

“Nope.” Jake huffed. “Think we should just try yelling?”

“The only teachers that’ll still be in the building are Mr Reyes having his end-of-day celebratory hot pocket all the way in the drama department, and Mr Williams, who’s probably passed out on his desk.”

Jake winced. “Yeah, Aled’s not really at the top of his game right now, huh?”

“Yeah.” Jeremy laughed gently. “I feel really bad for the guy. Highschoolers suck.”

“Speaking of people feeling bad…” Jake muttered. “Look, Jeremy, I – I _really_ didn’t mean to freak you out the other day. I just – I thought you liked me, and I got excited, and I started taking advice from Rich which is just a terrible idea anyways so… Sorry. I didn’t mean to freak you out.”

Jeremy felt his brain go blank. It was like his whole train of thought had crashed like a bad video game – _error 404, Jeremy.exe has stopped working._

Jesus, even when he was panicking, he was a nerd.

_(everything about him is so terrible)_

“Wait.” He frowned, looking at Jake properly and cutting off the voices in his head. “You – You weren’t joking?”

“Uh.” Jake blanked. “No? Why would I be joking?”

“But – but…” Jeremy babbled, mind going into overdrive. “But – you’re – you’re _you!”_

“… Yes.” Jake frowned slightly. “I thought we established that a while ago?”

“Wh- no, I mean-!” Jeremy pulled at his hair, trying to ground himself. “Y-You’re _you_ and I’m _me_ and – y-you wouldn’t wanna date me! It – it was just a prank, stop trying to be nice!”

“I’m not!” Jake protested, talking a cautious step towards the shorter boy and gently tugging his hands away from his hair. “I – Jeremy, I _like_ you. Like, I really like you, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you for weeks! Hell, I actually got Rich to help me ask you out and – well, you were there, you know how that turned out.”

“But-!” Jeremy squeaked. “Y-You – I’m not – I’m just _me!_ I’m – I’m anxious, a-and I can’t order food without rehearsing it in my head first, and I have the, the stutter thing, and-! _”_

“So?” Jake chuckled gently, like he wasn’t sure he should be doing it. “I think it’s cute.”

Jeremy tried not to explode.

“Jeremy – do you really think I wouldn’t like you?” Jake frowned. Oh fuck, he actually looked really sad, oh no, Jeremy was too bi for this!

“W-Well…”

“Hey.” Jake said gently. “Jer, do you really think you’re not special?”

Jeremy looked away.

“Cuz you are.” Jake went on, tilting Jeremy’s chin with his hand so he could look at him properly. “You’re amazing, Jer. You’re funny, and cute, and passionate – I could listen to you rant about musicals for days, man!”

“Deaf West Spring Awakening was underappreciated and more people should be talking about it…” Jeremy muttered.

“See? That shit.” Jake smiled softly. “I don’t even know what you’re saying half the time, but I don’t care. You get this look, like – like you don’t even know where you are or who you’re talking to, you’re just completely focussed on that one thing, because that’s how important it is to you, and you talk clearer and shit, ‘cuz you’re talking about something you really care about, and your voice speeds up and you have to backtrack ‘cuz of how excited you get, and… Jesus, Jer, I could listen to you forever.”

Jeremy squeaked, unable to actually say anything, and covered his face with his hands.

“No, hey!” Jake laughed, pulling his hands away carefully. “Look, Jeremy… I meant what I said before, okay? I think you’re cute, and just a really nice guy in general, and I wanna get to know you better. If that’s okay?”

Jeremy swallowed, looking up at the taller boy anxiously. He had a strong urge to fidget with his hands or twist his fingers into his cardigan, but Jake was still holding his hands, running his thumbs over the backs of his hands absentmindedly. His hands were big, bigger than Jeremy’s, and warm, so warm, with a few callouses from all the sports he did. They felt nice.

“This better not be a prank…” Jeremy mumbled absently.

“Jeremy.” Jake sighed, cupping his face with both hands. _“I like you_. Okay? I like your pretty eyes and your cute laugh and your beautiful voice and your little freckles. I like _you_ , Jeremy. What’s it gonna take for you to believe that?”

Jeremy bit his lip, eyes flicking down to Jake’s mouth subconsciously. Jake’s eyes widened, a small smirk spreading across his lips.

 _“Oh.”_ He grinned, taking another small step so he was standing flush against Jeremy. “I think I get it now.”

Jeremy grabbed the collar of Jake’s shirt and pulled him downwards.

Jeremy hadn’t really kissed anyone before. Well – that wasn’t exactly true. He’d kissed Brooke a few times, and Chloe once, but that was all with the SQUIP guiding him. The only time Jeremy had kissed someone properly was Christine, on their one and only date, and that was basically just a glorified granny kiss. And that one time when he and Michael had kissed when they were high (for _science!)._

Okay, scratch that previous statement, Jeremy had kissed people before. But he’d never had a _proper_ kiss, an actual teenage romcom, post-love confession, slightly emotionally unstable, _proper_ kiss.

Until now, that is.

Thankfully, Jake was patient with him. Warm, and inviting, and kind, so ready to just give and not ask for anything back in return. Without the SQUIP, Jeremy wasn’t really sure if he was supposed to move or angle himself in a certain way, but thankfully, Jake took most of the control when it came to stuff like that. He tilted Jeremy’s head slightly so their noses weren’t bumping, his tongue tracing Jeremy’s lower lip, more testing than teasing. He was being careful, cautious, waiting to see how far Jeremy wanted to take this before just rushing into it. Jeremy wasn’t really sure if he was supposed to pull away and tell him how far he was willing to go, partly because Jeremy wasn’t sure himself, mostly because he wasn’t sure if it was really normal to kiss someone and then say “hey, I don’t wanna totally put out here but I’m chill with hand stuff if you are” (not that Jeremy _was_ down for that – or maybe he was – hell, he didn’t know!). Jeremy stuffed down his intrusive thoughts, trying to move himself so he was pressed against Jake, arms around his neck, trying to pull him impossibly closer. Thankfully, Jake got the message.

He smirked against Jeremy’s lips, backing him up until his legs hit the top of one of the cupboards. Jeremy let out a terrible squeak as Jake hooked his hands underneath Jeremy’s thighs, lifting him up and placing him on the countertop carefully, like Jeremy was precious, special, like he _meant_ something.

Jeremy placed his hands on the countertop to stabilize himself and hummed softly into the kiss, wrapping his legs around Jake’s waist, as if to keep him from leaving. Judging by how much Jake seemed to be enjoying it, Jeremy doubted that would happen. As Jake’s tongue traced the seam of his lips, he moved his hands from the counter to tangle in Jake’s hair, giving it a light tug and relishing in the sound Jake let out (he’d always wanted to do that…). He felt Jake bite down his lower lip gently, swiping his tongue over it to soothe the bite, and he couldn’t help but moan softly against Jake’s lips. He squeaked, immediately pulling back from this kiss and slapping a hand over his mouth, as if to cram the sound back inside. Jake chuckled, brushing his lips over Jeremy’s cheeks, eyelids, forehead, everywhere.

“Pretty…” He mumbled against his skin. Jeremy whimpered against his will, burying his face in Jake’s chest and making him laugh even more.

“Hey!” Jake laughed gently (Jeremy could feel the vibrations in his chest, oh _fuck)._ “Hey, c’mon, Jer. Lemme see your pretty face? Please, baby?”

Jeremy preened at the pet name, lifting his head up to look at Jake properly. Jake smiled, cupping Jeremy’s chin with one hand, brushing his thumb over his lower lip. Jeremy blushed and, before he could think better of it, pressed a small kiss to the pad of his thumb. Jake flushed red, smiling down at him smoothly. Feeling bold, Jeremy leaned forward and brushed his lips over the skin of Jake’s neck.

The result was imminent. Jake’s breath stuttered, one hand moving to cup the back of Jeremy’s head, holding him to Jake’s neck. Jeremy felt a surge of power and confidence coarse through him. He felt brave. He scraped his teeth along Jake’s neck and, upon hearing his broken gasp, bit down gently.

“Jeremy…” Jake whispered, still holding Jeremy close to his neck. “God, Jeremy…”

Jeremy whined softly, moving to suck another mark into the sensitive spot beneath his jaw, when someone pounded on the door from the outside.

“Hello?” Michael called as the two of them jumped apart, Jeremy trying to control his blush and Jake desperately trying to fix his hair. “You guys done in there?”

“Is all your shit together?!” Rich snapped. “’Cuz you’re not coming out if it isn’t!”

“It’s together!” Jake yelled, frustrated. “Uh – wait, it’s almost together, gimme one second!” He turned to Jeremy quickly, a sheepish smile on his kiss-swollen lips. “So, uh. Is that a yes to that date?”

Jeremy felt his lips twitch into a shy smile, leaning up to press a tiny kiss to the tip of Jake’s nose.

“Yes.” He murmured softly.

“Awesome.” Jake grinned. “But we probably need to get out now before they think we’re fucking.”

“Knowing Rich, it’s probably too late.” Jeremy smiled bitterly as they made their way to the door, knocking on it gently.

“Shit’s together.” Jake called. “Let us out, please?”

The door opened slightly, Rich poking his head through the gap. He looked them up and down, a small smirk growing on his lips.

“Yep, it’s together.” He confirmed, opening the door fully. “Check it out, Mike!”

Michael looked them both up and down, grinning in delight.

“Damn, that went better than I hoped.” He laughed. “C’mon, Jer. I’m driving you home, right?”

Jeremy glared at him icily.

“… Or not.” Michael mumbled, backing away slowly. “Yeah, I’m just gonna go now…”

“Michael, I’m going to _kill_ you!” Jeremy snapped, rushing forward.

“Oh, shit!” Jake cried, grabbing him under the arms and holding him back. “Run, Michael, run!”

“Yoink!” Rich yelled, grabbing Michael’s hand and pulled him out of the art room, the two of them cackling like madmen.

“Okay!” Jake laughed awkwardly, holding a squirming Jeremy in his arms. “Let’s just tone down the murder there, Jerry…”

“That was humiliating!” Jeremy huffed, crossing his arms and pouting childishly. “I hate him. I _hate_ him.”

“I dunno.” Jake smiled gently. “I’m pretty happy right now. I mean, god knows how long it would’ve taken us to get our shit together otherwise.”

“If I hear someone say that one more time, I’m going to scream.” Jeremy growled through gritted teeth, but reluctantly leant back into Jake’s touch. “I guess it wasn’t _so_ bad…” He mumbled, turning around to look at Jake properly. “Oh, shit.”

“What?” Jake frowned. “Something on my face?”

“Um…” Jeremy mumbled awkwardly. “M-More like your hair?”

“What?”

Jeremy held up his hands, stained with paint from the countertop. The same hands that had been tugging on Jake’s hair not that long ago.

 _“Fuck!”_ Jake hissed, pulling out his phone and checking his reflection in the camera. “Dammit, could you’ve made those hickeys anymore obvious?”

“Sorry!” Jeremy squeaked. “I-I really wasn’t thinking, I’m so sorry!”

“Wh- No, Jer!” Jake chuckled. “I’m joking, dude. It’s really not that bad.”

“It – It isn’t?” Jeremy frowned. “But… People will know, and-!”

“So?” He smiled smoothly. “Maybe I want people to know about this.” He tugged on Jeremy’s waist gently, pulling him flush against his chest. “Maybe I want you to do it again.”

“Um!” Jeremy squeaked awkwardly. “A-Actually, uh, I was, um-“

Christ, he was stuttering so much, how was Jake not annoyed with him? He was just standing there, smiling and patient and perfect, god damn him, stupid perfect Jake!

“I-I was just, well…” Jeremy mumbled, fidgeting with his hands. “I-I just thought, um, well, I-I’d prefer it if, uh…”

“Date first?” Jake filled in for him, smiling gently. Jeremy sighed with relief.

“Date first.” He confirmed. “Sorry. I just… I don’t-“

“Jeremy.” Jake said. “It’s fine. Really. You don’t have to explain yourself.”

“Thank you.” Jeremy smiled gratefully. “I just don’t really know what I’m doing, a-and I don’t want to just – just…”

“It’s fine, Jer. I mean, I’d probably do the same if I were you.” Jake shrugged. “I know I don’t exactly have the best track record when it comes to dating, but… You are important to me, Jeremy. This, all of this,” He squeezed Jeremy’s waist for emphasis. “It’s more than just kissing and shit. I really like you.”

Jeremy smiled bashfully, hiding his face. “I-I really like you, too…”

“Tight.” Jake grinned. “C’mon, I’ll drive you home. I don’t know what you’ll do to Michael if you’re left alone in a car with him.”

“Nothing you can prove…” Jeremy muttered. “Fine.” He sighed, stepping away, but Jake kept their hands connected. “Are you sure that’s okay? You don’t have to drive me if you don’t want…”

“Nah, it’s chill.” Jake smiled. “’Sides, I gotta be able to pick you up for our date, right?”

“Uh – r-right!” Jeremy squeaked. Date. A date. They were going on a _date_.

“So, Saturday?” Jake asked gently as they walked out the door. “I’m thinking we can get lunch at the mall or something. If that’s cool?”

“That sounds good.” Jeremy nodded, biting his lip to hide his massive grin. “Sbarro?”

Jake visibly perked up. “Please? Unless you wanna go anywhere else!”

“Sbarro’s nice.” Jeremy smiled, leaning up on his tip-toes to kiss Jake’s cheek. “I’m looking forward to it.”

Jake grinned, disconnecting their hands so he could wrap his arm around Jeremy’s waist.

“Sounds fuckin’ sweet, Heere.” He smiled, pressing a kiss to Jeremy’s hair. “I can’t wait.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahahahaha i hate this
> 
> I CRIED THE WHOLE TIME I WAS WRITING THAT MAKE OUT SCENE BUT YOU ALL ASKED AND I DELIVERED GOD DAMMIT
> 
> that whole expensive headphones ‘hourly reminder’ exchange was inspired from a fic by leapordprintpants called ‘hourly reminder’ which i actually haven’t read because i’m not that good with smut but if you guys are then definitely read it they’re one of my favourite authors on here


	3. step 3. success!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DATE TIME DATE TIME DATE TIME!!!
> 
> also hap birth to @player-two-heere she is awesome and amazing and you should definitely check out her writing HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

  
"Yo Rich, shirt one or shirt two?"

Rich groaned, shoving one of the couch pillows over his head. "Tired! Go 'way!"

Jake huffed, marching into the living room and tossing a plastic cup at Rich's limp body. "Get up, ass munch, I need your help! One or two?"

"Does it fucking matter?!"

"C'mon, Rich, one or two?!"

"Fucking - two, I don't care!" Rich snapped, throwing the cup back at him. Jake went silent for a moment.

"... So I actually kinda liked shirt one but-"

"Whoa whoa, okay!" Rich said, pulling himself up on the couch. "Looks like I just helped you pick out a very important shirt, Jakey. Care to share?"

"What, nothing!" Jake said quickly. "It's nothing, just wanna look nice."

"You never care about looking nice." Rich said skeptically. "You're a proud fashion disaster, Jake, it's your way of life."

"W-Well, uh." Jake mumbled. "I - I kinda have a date?"

"You always have dates." Rich frowned, before his eyes suddenly widened. "Wait..." A slow grin spread across his face. "No freakin' way!"

"Don't!" Jake snapped, holding up his hand. "I just want it to go perfect, okay?! Jeremy - he's - this is important, Rich!"

"You mean he's important." Rich grinned wolfishly.

"Well, yeah..." Jake muttered. "Look, just - which one looks better?"

"Does it really matter?" Rich scoffed. "Jeremy thinks you look like a fucking snack every single day, dude. And uh, T-B-H? He's not wrong."

"Aw!" Jake smiled. "Thanks, bro! You too!"

"You're welcome, my man!" Rich grinned. "But seriously, you don't need to worry about the shirt. You look fine!"

"But it can't be just _fine_ , Richie!" Jake sighed, looking between the shirts in anguish. "It needs to be _perfect!"_

"Why?" Rich frowned. "Jeremy'll think it's perfect just being with you. He really likes you, dude."

"Well, I know that..." Jake huffed. "But I want to prove to him that I really wanna try for this, yknow?"

Rich smiled at his smitten friend. It was nice seeing Jake care so much about something.

"Here." He said gently, gesturing for Jake to give him the shirts. "Let me see."

oOo

Okay. He'd showered, he'd fixed his hair, changed his outfit, fixed his hair again, washed his face, changed his outfit again, tried using concealor to cover up his acne scars, washed his face again to get it off, restyled his hair, changed it back because it was better the first way, and changed his outfit one last time. He was ready.

But maybe he should put on his space cat shirt instead, that one was nice and oh god, was that a zit?! Maybe he should just ask to reschedule-

"Jeremy!" His dad called. "Your friend's here!"

Shit.

Jeremy bolted down the stairs, quickly checking his reflection in the mirror - the zit wasn't that big, maybe if he just moved his hair like that - okay, perfect, now go!

"Hi!" Jeremy said, way too loud, as he reached the door. "H-Hey, Jake..."

His voice trailed off. Oh god. Oh _god._ He was perfect.

"Hey!" Jake smiled smoothly, that perfect smile that made Jeremy's knees go weak, damn him. He was clad in a sleeveless blue hoodie - repeat, _sleeveless_ , his arms were on _full display_ , sweet _jesus_ \- along with a clean white shirt that clung to his body in the most unfair way possible, and dark jeans with a few tasteful rips that Jeremy could never pull off if he tried.

Sweet Lord Jeremy was bisexual.

Jake smirked, looking him up and down. "Lookin' good, Heere."

Jeremy squeaked awkwardly, suddenly feeling the urge to sprint upstairs and grab a blanket just so he could cover up his old faded blue flannel and day old grey shirt.

"Sorry..." He mumbled. "I - I wasn't really - I kinda panicked..."

"Hey." Jake smiled, reaching out to tug on the hem of his flannel. "Don't be sorry. You look cute, Jer."

Fuck.

"Well!" Jeremy practically yelled. "We're gonna - we're - hey, is that a door?!"

He ducked under Jake's arm, pulling them both out into the lawn and slamming the door after them.

"Whoa, hey!" Jake laughed, tugging on his arm to spin Jeremy around so they were almost chest to chest. "Relax, man, I'm sorry. Didn't mean to freak you out."

"N-No, it's not-!" Jeremy squeaked. "Sorry, I-I just - well... I guess I'm just a bit nervous. Sorry."

"Nah, man!" Jake laughed, pulling him in close. "I was a little nervous, too. I had to force Rich to help me pick out a shirt!"

Jeremy chuckled gently. "I-It looks good."

Jake brightened. "Really?"

"Well, yeah!" Jeremy laughed awkwardly. "I-I mean, when don't you - uh..." Shit. Jake smirked, leaning back slightly. Oh fuck, Jeremy was screwed.

"Yeah?" He grinned wolfishly.

"W-Well!" Jeremy floundered. "It's - y-you know..." He mumbled. "Y-You always... Look... Good..." His voice trailed off quietly

"Aww!" Jake cooed, ruffling his hair fondly. "You are so cute!"

Jeremy squeaked, jumping away. "Mall!" He spluttered. "Mall time!"

Jake laughed gently. "Okay. C'mon, my car's just down there."

He turned away to walk down to his car, and Jeremy was almost blinded by the neon orange lettering on the back of his hoodie - Hip Hop Don't Stop.

"Dammit, Rich..." Jeremy muttered as he followed Jake to the car.

oOo

"Behold, my favourite place in the world!" Jake grinned, waving his hands theatrically. "Sbarro!!"

Jeremy giggled softly, following Jake into the food court. "You really love Sbarros, huh?"

"Uh, duh!" Jake laughed. "Best pizza in the world!"

The pizza was aggressively mediocre. It was honestly weird how much Jake loved Sbarro.

"You're sure it's not something else?" Jeremy frowned. "Like - i-it's great, but... There are better pizza places."

Jake fixed him with a cold stare.

"Jeremy." He said in a flat, unimpressed voice. "Do not ever disgrace the good name of Sbarro."

"Um!" Jeremy flinched. "R-Right, I'm sorry."

"It's chill, dude!" Jake smiled brightly. "Sorry, I just like Sbarro."

"No, it's fine!" Jeremy said reassuringly. "I mean, I-I'm crazy about my own stuff, so..."

"Yeah." Jake smiled fondly. "It's cute."

Okay, Jeremy's heart had better calm the fuck down.

"Mind saving us a table?"

"Sure!" Jeremy squeaked, turning and walking away robotically. He found them a table near a wall, which was nice for the anxiety. Any loud, crowded public place was a Peak Anxiety Zone, but at least being near a wall made him feel a bit less... Surrounded.

Okay, he sighed to himself as he settled down at their table. This was... This was fine. He was on a date. With Jake. The most popular hottest sweetest kindest beautiful perfect guy at their school. Which was fine. Totally fine. Not freaking out at all.

"Heyo!" Jake greeted loudly, jolting Jeremy out of his panic - thoughts. "Here we go, best pizza in the world! Enjoy!"

Jeremy smiled awkwardly, nibbling on his slice. It tasted like plastic on cardboard.

"Good, right?" Jake grinned from across the table.

"Uh - yeah!" Jeremy forced a smile. "Awesome, just... Awesome..."

Jake quirked an eyebrow as Jeremy took another reluctant bite.

"You don't have to eat it if you don't want to."

"No, I do!" Jeremy said quickly. "See?" He said, taking a massive bite and immediately feeling his gag reflex kick in. Even his throat was begging him to get this shit as far away from him as possible.

Jeremy swallowed forcibly and winced.

"G-Good!" He smiled weakly.

"Jeremy." Jake said gently. "You really don't have to eat it."

Jeremy bit his lip, glancing from Jake to his half eaten slice. It really was terrible.

"Sorry..." He sighed, placing it back on his tray.

"It's really fine." Jake smiled, placing his hand on Jeremy's knee reassuringly. Jeremy tried not to focus on the electricity that burst out of the touch. "You don't have to act like you like something just for me, Jer."

"... Okay." Jeremy mumbled, looking away with a steady blush growing on his face. "I just - look, I have to know, what is it about this place? It's - The food is... Not good, and... I dunno. I just don't get why you like it so much."

Jake looked away, a small smile still on his lips.

"Well," He said quietly. "I guess 'cause, when my parents skipped town... This is all I can really afford."

Jeremy frowned. "Seriously? I thought-"

"I know." Jake said, still smiling, though it didn't reach his eyes. "Everyone thinks so. Probably 'cause of the house and the car and shit. But I really don't have that much money anymore. My parents can't exactly use their credit cards so it's not like they can transfer anything to my account to help me out. I have two part time jobs and I work nightshift on weekends so I can study and shit. Most of the time, I'm eating here. I think I count as a regular by now."

"Jake..." Jeremy murmured, guilt pooling in his stomach. "I didn't - I really didn't know-"

"It's okay." Jake shrugged. "No one really does. Not your fault. I - I know it's not really much, but... It's all I've got. And when something's all you've got, it's better to just make yourself enjoy it instead of complaining about it all the time."

Jeremy bit his lip. Damn, he was a dick.

"Hey." Jake scolded lightly, nudging Jeremy's leg with his own and poking at his temple gently. "None of that shit, this is a _date._ No self deprecation on dates!"

Jeremy laughed gently, nudging Jake back.

"Sorry." He smiled. "I'm just - I guess I'm a little nervous. I mean, you're so perfect, and I'm me, and now I've insulted your favourite place and you probably think I'm a jerk and now you're stuck on a date with a jerk and-"

"Hey." Jake said in monotone, looking at Jeremy intensely - not a glare or anything, but... A very strong look. "You're not a jerk. You're sweet. And I'm not perfect."

Jeremy scoffed. "Sure you-"

"Jeremy." Jake said firmly, staring at him in a way that clearly said how important it was that Jeremy knew this. "I'm _not perfect."_

Jeremy frowned. Why was Jake so insistent about this? If someone called Jeremy perfect he'd - well, he'd probably be a little weirded out because that's just not true, there's so many things wrong with him, anyone could see that, and, and...

"Oh..." Jeremy mumbled. "You - okay. Yeah. You're not... You're not perfect. Okay."

Jake smiled brightly. "Thanks."

"But I think you're pretty great..." Jeremy said awkwardly, his cheeks heating with every word.

Jake just smiled, reaching over the table to take one of Jeremy's hands in his.

"That sounds pretty perfect to me."

oOo

"I'm still sorry you didn't like the pizza."

"I had breadsticks!" Jeremy smiled reassuringly as they strolled along the boardwalk. "Breadsticks are nice."

"Still." Jake shrugged, looking away stubbornly. "Wish you'd enjoyed yourself."

Jeremy scoffed, nudging Jake's shoulder with his own. "I have enjoyed myself, stupid."

Jake beams at him when he says that, as if it's the greatest compliment anyone had ever given him.

"Well, I wish you'd enjoyed your food, at least."

Jeremy rolled his eyes, nudging Jake again. "I liked my breadsticks."

Jake smirked, grabbing Jeremy's hand as he nudged him and intertwining their fingers. "I like you."

Jeremy felt his face flush.

"Oh my god." He giggled awkwardly, leaning his face into Jake's shoulder. "That was terrible."

"Wh- shut up!" Jake laughed in disbelief. "I'm smooth!"

"You're awful!" Jeremy giggled into his shirt. "God, why do I like you so much?"

"'Cause I'm pretty!" Jake grinned, kissing Jeremy's forehead and making him giggle even more.

Jeremy was about to make a clever comeback when he noticed a flash of familiar neon lights.

The arcade. Just the sight of it was enough to make Jeremy jump for joy. So many memories. Him and Michael playing Pac-Man, Dig-Dug, Space Invaders, all the classics; trying and failing at the big racing games or first person shooters; falling on their asses as they attempted to skate without clinging to the wall like a baby deer learning to walk; lazer tag, nachos, slushies, DDR...

"Jeremy?" Jake frowned. "Earth to Jeremy? Come in, Jeremy!"

"Oh!" Jeremy squeaked, looking away. "S-Sorry, I was just-"

"Arcade?" Jake hummed, following Jeremy's gaze. "Yeah, I saw that a few times. Never really been in. You wanna go?"

"Oh - no!" Jeremy smiled sheepishly. "It's nothing, it's just - m-me and Michael, w-we go there sometimes, i-it's no big-"

"Let's go!"

Jeremy blinked. Jake actually wanted to go to an arcade?

He shook his head quickly. No, no, Jake wouldn't want to do that. He was just trying to go along with what Jeremy wanted - that wasn't fair.

"Y-You really don't have to." He said awkwardly. "I mean - I-I go all the time, and it's not really your scene and-"

"My scene?" Jake frowned. Oh shit, he actually looked offended. Like Jeremy had hurt him. "What do you think my scene is?"

"W-Well!" Jeremy squeaked. Shit, shit, he hadn't been trying to actually offend him or anything! "I-It's just - you're all - y-you're all cool and s-stuff, and, and you wouldn't enjoy it-"

"Why wouldn't I enjoy it?" Jake asked.

"B-... Because!" Jeremy cried, exasperated, waving his arms hopelessly. "You - you're all p-parties and stuff, you're not... Y-You wouldn't..."

Jake's face fell even further with every word.

"You're just doing it to be nice." Jeremy sighed, stepping away from him. "You don't have to do that just for me. You obviously aren't into that kinda stuff, so... You don't have to."

"Jeremy..." Jake murmured, looking almost heartbroken. "I thought we talked about this, I'm - You realize I'm not just that, right? I'm not just - just parties and drinking and whatever, I'm... I thought you knew that."

"Wh- no!" Jeremy squeaked. "No, no, I r-really - You are more than that! Y-You're really sweet, a-and funny, and you do a bunch of extracurriculars even though you don't have to and you never worried if people will think you're uncool or not for taking them, and you're a little oblivious sometimes but you try your best and honestly that's more than anyone else at our school does, and your fashion sense is terrible but you still pull it off really well because I mean look at you you're gorgeous, you're even pulling off that hoodie I mean it's kinda cringey but you make it look good, a-and I know you're not perfect but you're still really great to me, i-it feels like you can make anything ten times better and, a-and..."

He trailed off when he noticed Jake smiling at him softly.

"Let's just go to the arcade, cutie." Jake smiled, taking Jeremy's hand. Jeremy felt his face go tomato red.

"U-Um, well, uh, i-if you really want to, b-b-but I, uh-"

Jake snorted, lifting up their joined hands to press a kiss to the back of Jeremy's hand.

"Cutie."

oOo

"So..." Jake hummed as they entered the arcade, taking in the flashing neon lights and stale, stuffy smell of popcorn, pizza and plastic nacho cheese. In other words; home. "Which game do you wanna-"

"Oh, Dragon's Lair is free!" Jeremy squealed, all but yanking Jake to the bulky machine. Jake couldn't help but laugh softly at Jeremy's pure glee.

"So, what's Dragon's Lair?" He asked, taking in the flashing logo and cool Disney-esque graphics. "Looks sick."

"It is the sickest!" Jeremy grinned. "Well, one of the sickest. It's really hard - Michael would say Pac-Man's better, but he's biased - oh!" He laughed nervously as he realized he'd been rambling. "I-I'm sorry..."

Jake smiled, shaking his head. "Don't be. So, Dragon's Lair?"

"Oh, it's awesome!" Jeremy smiled brightly. "You're this knight and you have to rescue the princess by doing all these quick time events, like pressing your sword when something's glowing, or jumping when something's glowing, or-"

"Wait." Jake frowned. "How do I know which glow is for which move?"

"You don't." Jeremy shrugged.

"Okay..." Jake mumbled. "Oh, I get it! So like, you learn you as go. Right?"

"Not exactly..." Jeremy scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. "The order of events change every time you die, so if you fail one thing, then it won't come up again at the same place in your next run through. But when you do find that event again, at least then you'll know what to do!"

"Um." Jake blinked. "I... Think I get it?"

"Good enough!" Jeremy grinned. "I can go first, if you want. It is super hard. Michael actually got into the top three on the leaderboard, though! It's his proudest accomplishment."

"Awesome!" Jake smiled, even though he didn't entirely understand. Honestly, he didn't really have to. Seeing Jeremy so happy and carefree was awesome enough for him.

"So you use this button for the sword..." Jeremy mumbled as his knight character stabbed a skeleton guy in the chest. "And then you use this one for the jump..."

"I like the animation." Jake said offhandedly, leaning on Jeremy's shoulders as he manouvred his little character. "It's kinda like Disney."

"It's Don Bluth." Jeremy smiled. "It's what makes the game so awesome, really. It was the first game to actually use this style of animation."

"Seriously?" Jake said in genuine intrigue. "That's actually pretty interesting."

"Yeah." Jeremy said, not taking his eyes off the screen. "Don Bluth's one of my favourite animators. I watched The Secret of Nimh almost every day when I was a kid. My dad was actually kinda freaked out about it - I guess it's not really your average kids film..."

"Secret of Nimh?" Jake frowned. "I think I've heard of that. With the little mouse lady?"

"Mrs Brisby!" Jeremy smiled in delight, turning around to face him. "You know it?"

"Yeah!" Jake chuckled at Jeremy's pure joy. "I watched it, like, once, when I was a kid - it kinda scared me to be honest..." He laughed a little, a flashing light diverting his attention back to the screen. "Uh. Jeremy?" He frowned. "Your knight guy's dead, dude."

"What?!" Jeremy yelped, spinning back to face the game. "Dammit! I was doing so well that time!"

"Man, I'm sorry." Jake said sincerely, wrapping his arm around Jeremy's shoulders and pressing a kiss to his hair.

"It's fine." Jeremy smiled, leaning into his touch. "Not a big deal, really. I mean, normally I die in the first few seconds! That's something!"

"Yeah?" Jake laughed. "I think that calls for a round on the claw machine."

"Jake, no!" Jeremy whined as Jake dragged him to the claw machines. "Those things are rigged, everyone knows that!"

"You're forgetting one thing, dear Jeremy." Jake grinned wickedly, turning around and catching Jeremy offguard so they were chest to chest. "You're on a date with a superhero."

"Um!" Jeremy flushed at the close proximity. "S-Superhero?"

"Yup." Jake smirked, popping the 'p'. "And right now, you're my darling in distress."

"You mean damsel?"

"Isn't that a girl title?" Jake frowned. "I mean, I'm all for breaking gender stereotypes and everything, but I didn't wanna, like. Misgender you or anything."

Jeremy blinked. "Um." He said simply. "Wow. That was... Politcally correct."

"The only reason political correctness is viewed as a bad thing is because bigots don't want you to realize what they're doing is wrong, and will instead try to make you seem childish and stupid for trying to point out their bigotry." Jake said, deadly serious, before breaking into a wide grin. "I've been hanging out with Christine a lot. C'mon! Claw machine time!"

Jeremy rolled his eyes fondly, following Jake to the big claw machine tanks.

"Okay, which one do you want?" Jake asked, rubbing his hands together and bouncing on his toes.

"Jake, you really don't have to-"

"I'm going with the minion."

"Wait, no!" Jeremy squeaked. "Sparkly dolphin, always the sparkly dolphin!"

"Bingpot." Jake smirked. Jeremy face-palmed. He was way too easy to fool... "Okay, sparkly dolphin! Let's do this!" Jake said to himself, pumping himself up as he put the coins into the slot and the machine whirred to life. "Hey, mind going 'round to the other side? I need eyes on all angles here, dude. Teamwork! It's important!"

"I got it, I got it!" Jeremy laughed, doing a little half-jog to the other side of the machine. "Okay, move forward... Wait, stop stop stop!"

"Too far?" Jake asked, his voice sounding genuinely concerned.

"No, no, just one tiny nudge more..."

Jake booped the joystick. "That enough?"

"One more boop and we're golden."

He poked the joystick forward again. "Now?"

"Perfect. Now to the left a little?"

"How much is a little?"

"Like - four boops?"

Jake leaned the joystick to the left for a few small seconds. "Good?"

"Perfect!" Jeremy smiled. "But I'm telling you, it's rigged. It's just gonna keep on eating your money, dude."

"Oh, really?" Jake smirked, slamming the big red button down with gusto. The claw sunk down, the three jagged teeth planting around the poor little dolphin. As it reached closer to the drop box, the dolphin began to slip. Just as it looked like the small sparkly dolphin was about to fall from the claw's grasp, Jake ran around to Jeremy's side of the machine and shoved, hard. The claw swung forward, catapulting the stuffed dolphin into the drop box.

"Boom." Jake grinned down at Jeremy's starstruck face. "Superhero."

Jeremy gaped at him in awe.

"I have never been more attracted to you."

Jake snorted in at Jeremy's sudden declaration, leaning down to grab the stuffed dolphin from the drop box.

"Keep it in your pants, Heere!" He laughed, holding up the dolphin to his face. "There are children present!"

Jeremy chuckled gently, gingerly taking the soft dolphin toy.

"Cute, huh?" Jake smiled gently. "Whatcha gonna call him?"

Jeremy rose an eyebrow, smirking mischievously. "How do you know they're a boy? It's wrong to assume genders, Jake."

"Oh, shit!" Jake actually looked terrified for a moment.

"Oh - joking! I'm joking!" Jeremy laughed reassuringly. "I mean, it is wrong, though. Maybe we should just stick the they/them pronouns for the dolphin. Pick a gender neutral name?"

(Sidebar, were they really deciding on pronouns for an inanimate object?)

"Wait. Check the tag?"

Jeremy frowned, flicking up the tag on the dolphin's little tail.

"'Hi! This is Flipper.'" He read aloud. "Flipper likes long swims and playing with his friends. Take good care of him!'" He wrinkled his nose. "Sounds a little cut and dry..."

"There are only so many words they can put on a tiny tag, Jer-Bear." Jake chuckled. "Well, magic toy-maker person says Flipper here is a boy. Do we agree?"

"I'm afraid of what will happen if we disobey the magic toy-maker person, so... Yeah. We agree."

"Coolzies." Jake grinned. "C'mon, I saw a racing game over there and I wanna try."

"I warn you, Jacob." Jeremy smirked mischievously. "I have kicked quite a few asses at Mario Kart."

"Those asses being Michael?" Jake scoffed.

"... Mayhaps."

"I think I'll do fine." Jake grinned down at him. "You may know your vintage shit, but _no one_ beats me at racing games."

oOo

"Dammit!" Jake groaned, thumping his head on his plastic steering wheel for the third time. "I totally could've gotten you that time!"

"Oh, could you? Could you, Jake?" Jeremy gloated. "Just face it, I am the _king_ of arcades!"

"Hey, I got pretty close-!"

"The _king_!" Jeremy yelled over him, raising his fists to the sky. Well, the neon lights on the ceiling. "All of video games tremble before me!"

Jake chuckled gently, leaning back and watching Jeremy cheer.

"I am _the shit_ , Jacob!" Jeremy grinned. _"The shit!"_

Jake laughed fondly. "You sure are, Jer!"

"Damn right I am!" Jeremy jumped to his feet, doing a little dance around the racing game. "All hail me! The king of video games! None can match my skill!"

"None!"

"Tremble before me, mortals!"

"Can I kiss you?"

"You can kiss my ass - wait." Jeremy froze, spinning around to face him. "Y-You - uhh..."

Jake snorted in disbelief. "God, you're cute." He smiled, standing up so he was only half a step away from Jeremy.

"C-C-Cute - you - y-you think I'm c-cute - o-okay - uh - I..." Jeremy fumbled, his confidence seeping out of him quickly. "W-Well, uh - y-you, uh... Y-You look... Good...?"

Jake laughed gently, taking Jeremy's hands in his. "Well, damn, Jeremy, this is the fucking highlight of my life. Now I can go tell everyone the cutest boy in the world thinks I look good!"

"C-Cutest-?!" Jeremy spluttered.

"Yup." Jake smirked, popping the 'p'. "Sorry, I didn't mean to catch you offguard with the whole kiss thing." He rose one of Jeremy's hands to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of it. "I guess I can settle for this, though."

"Um!" Jeremy squeaked awkwardly, his face fully red. "I - I - um!"

"C'mon." Jake chuckled, gently tugging him towards the exit. "It's getting late."

"R-Right!" Jeremy stumbled after him, trying to control his blush. He was such an idiot...

"Hey." Jake said firmly, poking Jeremy's temple with his finger. "No self deprecating on dates."

"Oh!" Jeremy laughed gently. "Right, yeah. Sorry."

"S'cool, Jer." Jake smiled, tugging him a little closer so he could wrap his arm around Jeremy's shoulders. "C'mon. Home time."

oOo

The drive back to Jeremy's felt like forever had passed in no time at all. They'd talked more about video games, which had led them to talking about sports (somehow), Jake told some funny stories about the track team and a pretty hilarious incident that had happened while he was in the swim team (it involved whipped cream, swim shorts, and a coach whistle, and was probably the most amazing story Jeremy had ever heard). Jeremy talked about Michael, Jake talked about Rich, they both talked about how much their best friends had meddled to get them to go out with each other - though, to be fair, it had paid off. They both wanted to get dogs when they were older - Jake, a golden retriever, Jeremy, a small terrier. They both watched Brooklyn Nine-Nine and The Good Place and even traded show recommendations - Jeremy advised Jake to watch My Hero Academia and Jake said Jeremy should watch The Great British Bake-Off (he watched it sometimes when he was tired or stressed). Jake played Carly Rae Jepsen and Imagine Dragons for his part of the drive, and Jeremy blasted Hamilton and Little Shop Of Horrors during his turn, belting every note along with it.

"Wow." Jake whistled as Jeremy finished rapping all the parts to Non Stop. "Respect, dude."

"Thanks!" Jeremy said breathlessly. "The trick is to find where the lyrics overlap and then switch to the next part, do you have any water?"

Jake tossed him the bottle resting in his cupholder, and Jeremy chugged it gratefully.

"Thanks."

"No prob." Jake smiled. "So, what's the deal with you and theatre?"

"Hm?"

"I mean, I've heard you talk about it a lot, but I never asked why you're so into it."

"That's kind of like asking why you're into sports." Jeremy shrugged. "It just... Clicks with me, I guess. Which is weird, 'cause of the anxiety, but... Yeah. I love theatre. The songs and characters just get to me, yknow? Like Lifeboat, or Waving Through a Window. And Seymour from Little Shop, I totally related to him!"

Jake nodded, making a mental note to look up all those things when he got home.

"So yeah." Jeremy mumbled awkwardly. "I guess that's why I like theatre so much."

"That's awesome." Jake smiled. "I wish I could care about something like that. Most of my extracurriculars I just drop. It's kinda annoying, actually."

"Well, maybe theatre could be your thing!" Jeremy beamed. "You could be a great JD!"

"I don't know who that is, but thanks!"

"Oh, he's this guy with an asshole dad whose mom left him so he let his anger swell inside of him and he plots to kill all the popular kids with Veronica. And then he tries to blow up the whole school!"

"... Oh." Jake said simply. "That's... Nice."

"Yeah! You have the perfect voice for him." Jeremy smiled. "Oh, this one's mine!"

"Gotcha." Jake pulled into Jeremy's drive. "Wait here!"

He ducked out of his door and jogged over to Jeremy's side of the car.

"M'lord!" He smiled as he opened Jeremy's door for him, bowing dramatically.

"Thank you, kind sir!" Jeremy giggled, taking his hand and letting Jake pull him to his feet. They kept their hands connected as they walked up the drive to Jeremy's door.

"I had a really nice time tonight." Jake said sincerely as he let go of Jeremy's hand.

"Me too." He smiled bashfully, a light blush on his cheeks as he averted his gaze.

"Maybe... We could do it again?" Jake asked, hoping the eagerness in his voice wasn't too obvious.

"Really?!" Jeremy said, eyes wide in disbelief. "I mean - I-I know I wasn't that great, but..."

Jake frowned. "Uh, what?"

"At the mall." Jeremy sighed. "I didn't mean to insult your favourite place. O-Or be so rude at the arcade. I just get competitive when I play stuff like that, you should see me with Michael, I'm awful - wait, no, I - ugh..." He sighed again, looking away. "I really wanted this to be fun for you, but if you're just asking to be nice, you really don't have to, like, I won't start crying or anything, that'd be weird, but yeah you don't have to do anything you don't want-"

Jake rolled his eyes fondly and kissed him.

It was nothing like the kiss in the art room. That one had been needy, almost desperate, months of awkward pining thrown into one whirlwind kiss - this was different. It was slower. Gentle. More experienced, on Jeremy's end. He leaned up on his toes slightly, his hands on Jake's shoulders, trying to make up for the few extra inches Jake had on him. Jake's hands drifted to his hips, holding him gently, carefully, like Jeremy was the most precious thing he'd ever held. Jeremy's lips were so soft under his, careful and cautious, like he was afraid of making any wrong moves or it would be game over. Jake felt a small laugh bubble against Jeremy's lips, tilting his head for a better angle as he pulled Jeremy impossible closer.

Slowly, they drifted apart. Jeremy swallowed, licking his lips, just to make sure he hadn't imagined it.

"So?" Jake smirked.

"Um." Jeremy blanked, his mind still fuzzy from the kiss. "W-What?"

"So?" Jake prompted. "Do you still think I don't want to do this?"

"Oh!" Jeremy squeaked, his face flushing even further. "S-Sorry, um - I-I -"

Jake stood patiently, looking at Jeremy with a soft fondness in his eyes.

"... No." Jeremy mumbled. "Um, I mean yes, wait - I'm sorry, which means I think you do want to do this?"

"I think it's no." Jake smiled. "So... Next Friday? We can go eat somewhere else this time, if you want.

"My house!" Jeremy blurted. "Um, sorry! I-It's just - well - I-I have video games, I could teach you how to play... Or we could just watch TV, or hang out in the backyard - I make good cookies, we could do that!"

"Sounds perfect, Jer." Jake beamed. "I'll see you at school, nerd. Oh! Don't forget this little guy..." He mumbled as he retrieved Flipper from his hoodie pocket. His gross, royal blue hoodie with no sleeves and the neon orange lettering on the back that Jeremy loved.

"Thanks." He giggled. He leaned up and poked Flipper's nose to Jake's cheek, making kissy noises with his lips. "Flipper says bye, too. And thanks. For such an awesome night."

Jake chuckled gently, leaning down to kiss Jeremy's cheek. "Cutie." He said with a smile in his voice.

Jeremy was about to say something (probably just awkward bisexual stuttering to be honest) when the door creaked open behind him.

"Jeremy?" His dad's voice rang out. "Is that you? What's taking so - oh!"

"Hey, Mr Heere!" Jake smiled wide, the extra charming smile he reserved for impressing parents. "Sweet khakis, man!"

"Oh, uh, thank you!" Jeremy's dad smiled awkwardly. "Uh - are you coming in? I can make cocoa!"

"Actually, I'm just heading out." Jake laughed gently. "But that's nice of you to offer! Maybe next time?"

"Oh, sure!" Mr Heere nodded. "I always have room to spare for Jeremy's, uh...?"

"Boyfriend!" Jeremy blurted.

"Boyfriend?" Jake asked in disbelief.

"Um!" Jeremy squeaked. "I-If you want to, that is, y-you don't have to-"

"Boyfriend." Jake grinned. "Yeah. I'm his boyfriend."

"... Okay!" Mr Heere clapped his hands together in that weird way parents did. "Well, I look forward to seeing you again, uh..." He snapped his fingers a few times. "Jake, was it?"

"Yep! You too, Mr Heere!"

"Great." Mr Heere smiled, shooting Jeremy a small glance. "Well, I'll just be, uh..." He nodded to the door. "You two say goodnight now, it's getting late."

"Okay, dad."

"Sure thing, Mr Heere."

Jeremy cringed as the door closed.

"I'm so sorry!" He whimpered into his hands. "That was so embarrassing, I'm so sorry!"

"Jeremy, relax!" Jake laughed, pulling him into a quick hug. "It was awesome. More than awesome. It was awesome squared!"

"Dork." Jeremy snickered into his chest before pulling away. "Well, um. Goodnight. Boyfriend."

"Goodnight, boyfriend." Jake beamed, spinning on his foot as he hopped back to his car. "Oh!" He exclaimed just before he got inside. "And goodnight, Flipper!"

Jeremy laughed, raising Flipper's fin in a little wave.

He smiled softly to himself as Jake drove away, hugging the dolphin close to his chest.

Boyfriend.

He liked the sound of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aww this was fun! definitely one of my top three favourite projects. i think it goes spider jer, okay that's something, this, what in fire nation and then tumblr gremlins. i'm so proud of this though. i was a little scared i wouldn't finish it. guess i just needed percy's birthday to give me the push! happy birthday percy!

**Author's Note:**

> jake: babe... happy one year.
> 
> jeremy:
> 
> jeremy: i'm sixteen
> 
> i decided to post the chapters one at a time instead of all together like okay, that's something because it's been a while since spider jer ended and i want to warm myself up for my next project
> 
> that article's real btw: https://thoughtcatalog.com/rania-naim/2016/04/50-hilarious-cheesy-pick-up-lines-that-will-definitely-make-your-crush-smile/


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